Massage? Take your pick...

There are different types of massage doled out at my house.

1. The broom massage. Maya and Smokey lie on the back terrace while Miguel is sweeping up the plant debris. He runs the broom over their bodies while they lay there and enjoy every stroke, rolling over so he can get the other side.

2. The remote control massage. Minina thinks holding a remote control in your hand means she should jump up and meow for you to run the remote along her spine. During the massage she meows in ecstasy and rubs her head on anything close; she is one happy kitty during her massage. Sometimes she gets confused between the remote control and the cordless phone; the phone obviously doesn't have the same feel because she doesn't get into the massage with the phone like she does with the remote.

3. The tick massage. This is for Loco. He loves when I go over his body with my hands, searching for ticks. He lies on the floor limp, and lets me move him wherever I want. He closes his eyes and almost falls asleep. Sometimes he is in another part of the room and he scratches, and then he comes over to me as if to say - "there, did you see where I scratched? You might want to check me out there".

4. The under-the-hammock massage. This is for Negra. She loves when we are lying in the hammock, because that brings the level to the height of her back, where she can stand underneath and rub against us. The side effect of her rubbing is that she moves the hammock, so we get a good swing going while she gets her back scratched.

5. The phantom massage. This is for the grey stray cat in the garden. We just get close enough to reach out and try to stroke him, and he moves away, leaving our hands hanging in mid-air. He doesn't know what he's missing.

6. The finger massage. Luna likes to lie in my lap and have my fingers swirl through her fur - but just at the head and shoulders (if I touch anywhere else she will gently bite me to let me know she doesn't like to be touched there). I will be reading and absently playing with her fur and she's happy, but if I stop, she meows to let me know she noticed. I keep it up until I either get too hot and make her get down, or she dozes off and doesn't notice that I've stopped.

7. The sneak massage. This is when both of us are on the sectional couch and one changes position to put their head in the center part. This allows the hands to grasp onto a nearby foot and just rub or squeeze while reading or watching tv. The recipient rarely acknowledges this massage, because it is often done subconsciously and we don't want to disrupt the massage.

8. The traditional massage. As far as I'm concerned, this is the best thing going in my house. Better than spaghetti, better than chocolate, better than...(well, use your imagination and put your favorite thing here). I have a body that hurts every day and screams for massage, and it can never get enough of strong hands kneading sore muscles, especially the shoulder and neck areas. It's nice at any time of the day or night, but it's best as I drift off to sleep. Mmmm...