I sit for hours on the couch with my laptop. I used to try to keep my feet up to prevent swelling, but I found that position put too much strain on my lower back. So now I sit upright with a pillow supporting my back, and my feet flat on the floor.
In front of me is the coffee table - a catch-all for coffee mugs, water glasses, paper and pens, books, remote controls, and a few other odds and ends that we feel we need at arm's length. On the floor beside a leg of the coffee table sits a can of Baygon. Insect spray.
Because apparently my feet smell...like limburger cheese. I am not aware of a smell, in fact I think Miguel's feet smell more than mine (but not of cheese, just of feet). And I KNOW Loco's feet smell - doggy feet. But of all of us sitting on or near the couch, the pesky mosquitoes pick my feet, and according to experts on the internet, it's because they are attracted to feet that smell 'cheesy'.
Pungent, is how wikipedia describes the smell of limburger cheese. But which came first? The cheese that smells like rotting feet or the feet that smell like shockingly odorous cheese?
Come on, really? My feet are CLEAN!! But...
The mosquitoes flutter around my feet and ankles, biting until they are so full they can barely fly. Their bites make my feet very itchy, and so a bottle of Solarcaine is also sitting on the coffee table, to help soothe the itch.
When I become aware of a mosquito zooming around, I grab the can of spray and wait in ambush. As soon as Loco sees me reach for the can he is up and gone - he hates the spray. Miguel isn't too thrilled with it either, except when it's him applying the spray - then it's ok. I understand how they feel, but not only are the bites annoyingly itchy, I could catch Dengue Fever.
The mosquitoes are smart, they hide under the couch until I grow tired of waiting for them and go back to my work. And then they strike. Again I grab the can and stare at where a mosquito just was, and sometimes I get lucky and I get to zap the darn bug. Sometimes I just point and shoot at where I think the insect might be - sort of like a random shooting - if I didn't get the one that bit me, maybe I got one that was just waiting its chance. In time, little mosquito bodies litter the floor around me and I can sit in peace for a while.
Sometimes I spot a mosquito fluttering around Loco as he lays on the floor at my feet. I don't want to spray Loco, so I try to swat it, or step on it. Loco doesn't appreciate me swatting him, he gives me a dirty look as if to say "what the heck did I do to deserve that?!", and moves to another part of the house.
Even though we really don't have a mosquito problem, I get bitten at least several times a day. Mostly around my feet - usually when I'm out hanging the laundry, lying in the hammock, or sitting on the couch. And I can't believe it's the cheesy smell attracting the mosquitoes - I hardly even like cheese, and the cheese I do like, and eat here in Mexico (Manchego), is so mild.
I will have to ask Miguel to check my feet to see if they smell like limburger. Does anyone know how to say "Limburger cheese" in Spanish? Otherwise I will just get a blank look or a nod of agreement (Mexicans love to tell you what they think you want to hear). I can see it now - his grinning face telling me that yes, my feet DO smell like "Spanish word for Limburger" cheese. So proud, thinking he said the right thing.